Trikz

When you think of Trikz, what comes to mind? Some might think of the kind of illusions performed by magicians, while others think of what a whore does for money. Honestly, I think there’s a bit of crossover between the two, as a skilled escort arguably knows how to work some real magic. The escorts at Trikz have some extra special magic of their own, too, something that you’re not going to find attached to every broad selling pussy out of the McDonald’s restroom. What is that special magic, you ask? Well, I’m talking about their big ol’ cocks.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen and johns, Trikz.co.uk is a directory of transexual escorts based in the United Kingdom. If you like your chicks to come with dicks and don’t mind paying for your entertainment, you’ve definitely come to the right place. (If you’ve stumbled here by accident looking for more traditionally female paid cock smokers, I’ve got what you’re looking for on my big list of Escort Sites here at ThePornDude.) I’ve been horny all day and thinking I might upgrade my usual evening masturbation routine to a full-on erotic sausage massage. Let’s see what kind of action I can find.

Where Are You Looking to Get Laid?

I’ve got to say, Trikz has one of my favorite logos I’ve seen all week. It’s got one of those pseudo-handwriting fonts with a silhouette of a stripper replacing the I, and looks a hell of a lot like something you’d see on the sign outside of a strip club or porn shop. Look a little bit closer, though, and you’ll see that gal has a big ding-a-ling dangling between her stripper shoes. It’s funny, and if you’re into trannies, you might even think it’s kind of hot.

Like any good escort site, you can browse the menu by location. They’ve got trans escorts listed all across the UK, so you should be covered wherever you’re trying to score. Regions like London, West Midlands, Wales and Scotland are listed at the top with map icons, so even the illiterate can get blown by a hooker with a penis. I took a quick peek down the North West aisle and found a couple dozen shemales selling their services.

The front page has a Featured section labeled Hottest TS Escorts, a descriptor that’s hard to argue with. A lot of them are fully passable, their huge hogs the only giveaway that they don’t fit the typical female mold. A couple of them hide their dongs in their front-page profile shots, and could potentially catfish the transphobic who don’t know about the little secret downstairs.

Even before I’ve left the front page of Trikz, I’m impressed by the wide range of trans escorts available. There are blondes, brunettes and redheads. I see white t-girls, Asian ladyboys, ebony trannies and exotic shemales. A few are MILFy, most are younger. Choose from thick bodies and slim ones, big tatas and small, giant donkey dicks and little pickled peppers. If you prefer a TS escort with a chiseled, masculine jawline to contrast with her feminine jugs and booty, you’ll be happy, too.

One of the things I like immediately about Trikz.co.uk is that they allow explicit, filthy photos of titties, ass, and dick. I hate when escort sites restrict that stuff, because I’m a firm believer in the idea of looking at something before paying for it. You don’t want to take a beautiful woman home only to discover the giant penis she promised you is a measly little worm, or worse, that she has a vagina! Oh my fucking god, the horror!

Check Out These Kickass Filters

There are a few key features I look for in an escort directory, and one of them is a good set of filters. I had a feeling Trikz had some tricks up their sleeve in this regard, because they brag about it in a little line near the top of the front page. “Filter down to the shoe size,” it says, “literally.” Why, I don’t mind if I do.

The basic search lets you choose your region and city, set ranges for age and dick size, as well as specify position (Top, Bottom, Versatile, Vers Top and Vers Bottom). That’s an alright set of filters, but if you really want to dial in your dream t-girl, hit the Detailed Search button to pull up the full set of options.

Sure enough, Trikz.co.uk has one of the best sets of search filters I’ve seen on an escort site lately, let alone a TS escort site. Shoe size is there, as they mentioned, and you’ve also got options for dress size, boob size, pubic hair style, and a nice set of measurements. You can dial in preferences like hair color and length, eyes, nationality and ethnicity. They’ve even got star signs for the astrology-minded tranny fans out there.

There are some checkboxes for enhancements like breast enlargements, lip fillers and hormone therapy. Personally, I really love the services menu, where you can check off boxes like Cuckoldry, CIM, Bukkake, Fisting and Feminisation. Remember I mentioned those escort sites that ban explicit photos? They usually ban detailed listings like this too, forcing customers to guess, negotiate and gamble because everything’s got to be vague or hidden in secret code. Trikz has explicit listings, so you know exactly what’s available. If you want butt fucking, just check the Anal box instead of trying to dance around the fact.

The Services menu is surprisingly thorough, encompassing even deep-niche fetishes like Scat and Machine Sex. I rarely see Poppers mentioned on American sites, but it’s included as a Service here. Whatever you’re into, Trikz makes it really fucking easy to find. As an absolute deviate myself, I can certainly appreciate that.

Finding a TS Escort in London

I began my Trikz.co.uk search in London, which gave me nearly a hundred tranny escorts to choose from. Employing the Detailed Search, I narrowed the cock range down to four-to-eight inches, then I checked the Breast Enlargement box and hit Search. That still gave me 60 results, so I clicked BDSM (Giving) to see what kind of freaks were available.

That left with me with a much more manageable selection of just four shemale escorts. Hell, I could conceivably bang all of them today as long as I remember to snort my usual dose of Viagra. I decided it’d be easier to start with one, though, and clicked on a blue-eyed, exotic and fully passable TS babe named Belle.

Earlier, I’d noticed that a lot of the sluts on Trikz list their rates, but Belle ain’t one of them. I get it; this leaves her room for negotiation, which means she can charge you more if you sound so grotesquely fat that you can’t speak clearly, or charge you less if you manage to charm her pants off, you big stud. Her blurb says she doesn’t accept drug users, so I guess I better burn the blunt I rolled on the way there instead of sharing it with her. (Just kidding. Don’t be a dick and ruin it for everyone else. Respect your escort.)

You can view contact info on Trikz without signing up for an account, which is great. What isn’t great is that Trikz doesn’t have a section for user reviews yet. This has become one of my biggest make-or-break features for an escort site, because it goes a long way in ensuring you’re not throwing your money away when you’re trying to buy something over the internet. I feel like the feature is even more important on an escort site, since the world’s oldest profession has always been ripe for scams. Adding a review section would make the site safe as well as more useful. That said, it ain’t a dealbreaker.

I’d say my favorite feature on Trikz.co.uk is their advanced set of search features, which is truly top shelf when you compare it to a lot of the other escort sites out there. Combine that with the detailed listings and big, ripe menu of TS escorts and it’s hard to go wrong. Once they add a review section, this might become a perfect trans escort directory.