YesBackpage

Yes Backpage! The younger folks among you might not recognize this name just yet, but I’ll school you. No worries. The older among you probably remember the original Backpage. It used to be a classifieds website that was entirely free to use and featured all kinds of used carburetors and washing machines. Yes, you could purchase someone else’s worn socks at a premium and even find a decent tailor in your area to finally fix that oversized zipper that’s hanging over where your bulge should be. Oh, and there were also a lot of escorts.

Ah yes, Backpage was a haven of commerce. You could buy and rent anything from anyone, provided they were within a trading range. It functioned kind of like the trade channel in World of Warcraft. People had shit you want, and they wanted you to know about it. You wanted shit they had, so you dropped them an e-mail and set up the exchange. Honestly, that website was a bastion of the free market. Well, that’s until it was shut down by a certain federal organization that tends to ruin everyone’s fun whenever websites get a bit too naughty for their own good.

As it turns out, Backpage became a de facto haven of adult services because, why the fuck wouldn’t it? If a website allows everyone to post anything in the form of an ad, you know that pussy will eventually make it on the auction block. And boy, was there a lot of pussy on the original Backpage. It was the unfiltered and unregulated Mecca of smut trade. Whether you were trying to rent out some VHS tapes of pussy or you wanted to get your hands on the real thing, you could find tons of listings in your local area. It indeed was a sight to behold. And then, the ban hammer came down hard, and that site was scrubbed from the internet.

YesBackpage, The New Backpage

It’s hardly news at this point: I mean, you can read the story right under the title of this website. YesBackpage is the new and improved Backpage. It’s new and improved in the sense that the original site is banned, and this one is not. How do they get away with running the same service on a .com domain? I don’t know. It is not my business. I’m just here to review the site for its design and the quality of “washing machines” they’ve got to offer. And boy, are there a lot of “washing machines” on this site.

Before we dive into the various sections of YesBackpage, let’s run a bit comparing it to the original. It’s identical. There, we’ve compared everything that needs comparing. I’m not sardonic here – YesBackpage is literally just a blank ass white page with blue lettering across tons of categories. First, you pick your region; then, you choose the category of the product or service that you’re looking for. You get a list of local yahoos that offer what you need and check out their posts.

The Listings and Layouts

It’s all one big dumpster fire. I’m not a stickler for design, but dear God, this place looks like a shithole. I know that the original charm of Backpage was the whole retro approach. The web devs behind it wanted to let the actual content do the work. The entire point of the site is that it’s empty and lifeless except for the listings. That’s what you’re there for. But I’m still going to bitch and moan about the fact that every single listing on here looks too painful to even make sense of.

First of all, every single listing looks like it spat out by a bot. None of the shit written on the actual pages makes any sense or informs me of any of the shit I might like to know about before signing up for a service. Keep in mind that YesBackpage doesn’t actually offer a service. They don’t do any escrow or buyer protection. They just keep the listings up for people to see. You have to manually dial the fucking phone number listed under the specific listing and hope for the best.

So Much Spam

As you can imagine, the entire goddamn site is littered with listings that come in every few minutes or so. There’s just no sensible way to tell what is real and what is the result of a spam bot. I randomly jumped into the regional section for New York City, thinking that it’s one of the largest and most commercially vibrant cities on the planet. I figured that if I were to find a washing machine for sale anywhere on the site, it would be sold in New York City. Tough luck. Imagine my surprise when I found out that there’s not even a single piece of furniture available anywhere in New York City. This is depressing.

So, I guess the entire purpose of YesBackpage is to replace the escorts section of the original Backpage. All right, I get that. People need a place for these kinds of posts. And, it’s not like I’m condoning what they’re doing. I’m just reviewing the site. But, if the escorts section is the main event, you’d think that YesBackpage would make some effort to keep fake posts away. No such luck. The first listing I checked was by some chick who claimed that she’s some hot-blooded Latina looking for company in downtown Manhattan. Her profile picture was literally Lana Rhoades. She wasn’t even trying to hide it.

So, unless Lana Rhoades is a Latina and moved to New York to become an escort, this is probably a fake listing. Getting around the fake posts is going to be a fucking nightmare. I wish I could give you some advice to help you figure out what’s fake and what’s real, but the place is so saturated that at this point, I doubt there’s any reason for you even to hope to find a single real person on here.

It’s About the Escorts

Look, it’s evident that YesBackpage is only really here for the escorts section. The damn place is saturated with posts. They come in every few minutes or so. It’s clear what the intent is. They wanted to replace the original Backpage that got taken down with a virtually identical site. But they didn’t give a shit about the rest of the classifieds at all. Hell, there isn’t a single classified ad here under the other sections for all of New York City. Maybe I’m not looking in the right place, but I tried finding all kinds of shit like furniture, cars, and non-sexy services. I found nothing. Zilch. So, it’s all about the escorts then.

That’s fine and good, except most escort posts are botted and automatic spam links. I don’t get what their incentive is, but they must be peddling something. Bots don’t get paid to post classifieds for no reason. Maybe the “Female Body Investigators” are posting on here, trying to get a honeypot going. I don’t fucking know.

Try it Out

You’re free to use the site as much as you want, and you’re also free to post. It’s a free site, after all. I can’t say that it’s a better alternative to any of the other sites on this list since it’s mostly just riddled with bot spam. I do not see anything here that stands out as better than any other listings site. You’d be better off looking for listings on a search engine at this point.

That being said, I’m sure that as with any similar site, there are some legitimate, high-quality posts here; they’re just really hard to find. So, best-case scenario: Dig into YesBackpage and comb through every single listing. Try to find the one high-quality escort and buy her a Counter-Strike knife skin. That’s all well and legal, after all.

Maybe YesBackpage will improve in the future, or perhaps it’s just a remnant of a time long past. I don’t know. I’ll be checking in on it once in a while, and you’re free to check-in too. I doubt that this site has much of a future ahead, but you never know. There will always be escorts looking to capitalize on free real-estate, and websites don’t get any free to use than this. Good luck finding love on YesBackpage.