Hey Hentai! I’m always on the lookout for new, awesome sites full of incredibly sexy hentai videos. And that’s not just to tell you fucks about them. I love this shit. I want my own personal library of kick-ass hentai sites to bust nuts to. But sometimes I have to be a little generous and give you dudes the deets. After all, the more traffic these sites get the more content they can pump out. And, as you know, not all hentai sites are created equal. Some fucking suck while some will blow your damn mind. Let’s hope the one I’ve got for you today is the latter, but I have my doubts.
HeyHentai.com is a premium hentai site. That’s already got me dubious. I’m not usually one to pay for my hentai when there are so many, and I mean so fucking many, free hentai sites out there with full-length HD videos. But, hey, who knows, maybe this site is bringing some incredible quality to the table. I don’t mind paying as much if the price and content is right where it needs to be.
HeyHentai isn’t brand new to the game. They popped up back in 2010, or at least that’s when the domain went up. From then, they’ve had a rocky journey. In the past year or so they’ve had views that have ranged anywhere from 80-300 thousand every month. Not the most consistent track record. I’ve known meth-addicted prostitutes that manage to keep a more stable client base than this site does, damn.
Expensive Membership Price for What You Get
And it’s your pretty standard subscription price. It’ll run you anywhere from 9-30 bucks a month depending on how long you sign up for. They do have a 3 day trial for a buck, so that’s not too bad. But be wary of that shit. They charge you 50 bucks a month if you don’t cancel in time after that. The whole subscription page is misleading. It does shit like “only 5 memberships left” and you can’t view any video previews or check out how many videos they have. I get that sites want to have some mystery to draw people in, but at least give us a small peek of that good shit.
I know I usually go over other details first, but I’m going to do this a little backwards here because there’s some shit you should know. I sat down and bit the bullet here so you didn’t have to. It’s like letting your friend fuck some kinky sluts pussy during a threeway. Yeah, she’s only half paying attention to that mediocre blowjob she’s giving you, but you get infinite bro points for that move. That sort of karma pays off in the future. Plus, it’s not like I’m not getting enough action on my own.
Under 200 Videos of Short, Low-Quality Clips of Decades-Old Hentai Videos
I’d hazard a guess that they aren’t giving all the details because the catalog is lacking. That’s not an instant death sentence here, but it was disappointing. You’re getting access to around 200ish clips of sexy hentai videos. I had high hopes that these videos would be full-length episodes of new, bold, kinky hentai. And, you would think that would be the case, but this site is hopping on that nostalgia train instead. You’re getting 5-10 minute clips from old-style hentai, which isn’t necessarily a bad deal. Some of those old hentai shows were fucking amazing.
No Tags, Categories, or Even Episode Names
They don’t even bother labeling the videos right. You know how I love organization. I guess most people who are jerking their dicks raw don’t care too much where their hentai is coming from, but I’m a man of taste dammit. I have favorite series that I nut to on a daily basis. I want episode names, artists names, series titles, character names, and all that shit so that I can cross-reference it and jerk it to only the best series. I mean come on “Hottie with a nice rack takes on 2 big cocks” is the best you could come up with? A quick reverse search brought up the name of the hentai you lazy cucks. It’s that easy.
No Way to Stream or Download Videos in HD
The video quality options were confusing. Yeah, it’s old hentai, so I wasn’t expecting 1080p streaming or downloading options, as nice as that would be. You get “low quality” or…”iPhone version” as download/streaming options. What the fuck does that even mean? At the very least I’d like to see them include the actual video quality as a toggle option. And I feel like some of this hentai have remastered versions or at least higher quality downloads. Some of these feel lackluster. I really hope they throw up some more modern hentai as well.
One thing the site has got going for it is the site design. It’s got a white and pink theme that looks fairly modern. It’s not going to blow you away or anything, but it’s functional. And, really, the only page on here is the videos page. Other than that it’s home or support. You can organize the previews by recent, most viewed, or top rated. The previews are fine enough. Title, video length, and rating. No upload date. No animated previews to speak of. They need to make some changes if they want to keep that traffic consistent.
On the videos, they include a section for photos, which I thought was weird. That’s usually a live porn type deal. You know those sexy photos from photo shoots that they tack on below or on a separate tab? Love that shit, They advertise them as HD photos, so I thought, hey, at least I’ll get some sexy HD hentai pictures out of it. They should rename it to “screenshots” or something along those lines. These are just screen grabs from the video that are nothing close to HD. Disappointments like these are giving me flashbacks to my bitch of an ex, fuck.
A Pretty Decent Mobile Experience
The mobile site was actually good. I wasn’t sure what to expect given the desktop versions lack of features, but it happens to be decent. Video previews take up the center of the screen, and you can browse through the videos pretty easily. They all play and stream without issue. No complaints here. If they had a more sizeable catalog then this site would be a blast to fap to on mobile. I do like some of the subtle changes they made on here. The menus are tucked away neatly. Video previews are easily visible. I honestly expected a straight port of the desktop version, but they surprised me.
ThePornDude’s Favorite Features
The site theme and design is pretty on point. I mean, how could I not be all for their mascot? It’s an anime chick in tight swimwear with massive tits. They know how to win my heart over. And the mobile version of the site kicked some ass as well. I hope they put that same amount of attention towards drumming up some kinkier hentai content.
Membership is way overpriced for the slim catalog of content that you get. Ditch the memberships entirely and throw ads on here would be my main suggestion. That’ll drum up some more views while allowing a wider breadth of content. And, hey, add some HD videos and make them require a membership or something. Regardless, something about this setup needs to change. It’s not working out well for the site and it’s not where it needs to be for the average user. A few structural changes here and there will make this site a great source of old school hentai.
ThePornDude’s Final Thoughts
Overall, this site has some good points, but it suffers from a small catalog and a site lacking any filter or organization features. But keep an eye on them. Sites like this have a track record of proving me wrong and rocketing up to the top when nobody's looking. Hopefully, they can get some more content in there and do some decent site changes. But, as is, you still might want to check it out for the kinky, old style hentai porn that you likely won’t find anywhere else.