Rule34Paheal? I know what you're thinking? What the fuck is this Rule34 Paheal shit? Well, Rule 34 (animated) is a popular meme that essentially states, ‘if it exists, there is porn of it.’ In other words, it’s the idea that, since the world is filled with weird and perverse people such as yourself, there is porn of every single thing imaginable. Or, as rule34.paheal.net puts it in their About section, “There IS porn of it, no exceptions.”
Intricate drawings of Pokemon fucking their masters? There’s porn of it. Weird manga of fairies having every orifice filled with monstrous tentacles? There’s porn of it. Videos of grannies drinking shit and cum cocktails? Well, you get the picture (unfortunately, in that case).
If you are ever in doubt of the bold creative spirit of humanity, just look at the porn industry. It’s amazing the lengths people will go to get off. There is even a porno in the process of being made that will be shot in space. That’s right, antigravity fucking in a rocket ship. The two porn stars cast for it have been training for years for the role of a lifetime.
We put a man on the moon, and, now, we will put a man in a woman near the moon and film it. There’s nothing that we can’t do when we’re horny. Imagine if we applied this level of motivation and creativity to use in other fields. If only fucking could somehow solve problems like global warming and war. We would live in a beautiful utopia. I guarantee it.
Well, if we are going to have to deal with massive floods, superstorms, and potentially the extinction of our species, at least we will have an endless supply of porn to enjoy in the meantime — nothing like fapping away the woes of the world. If we can’t solve the world’s problems, at least we can make ourselves feel good while we still have the chance!
32 Rules on Rule 34
At Rule 34 Paheal, you can both have access to and contribute to an enormous archive of illustrated and Photoshop porn. Rule 34 actually has a few rules (aside from the rule that is Rule 34, of course). The number one rule (as it should be on all sites) is that underage porn of any kind will not be tolerated under any circumstances. Additionally, the site does not allow any Photoshopped images featuring body parts of minors in any way (meaning no underage girls heads copy / pasted on adult or animated bodies, etc.).
Rule 34 also does not allow anything that would be considered “toddlerkon,” meaning drawn images, 3d renderings, or anything depicting girls who appear to be underage. They really do not fuck around when it comes to this kind of thing. Thankfully.
You are also not allowed to post images or videos of anything that depicts animals “in an explicit manner.” The rule goes on to say, however, that anything drawn is acceptable. Which is weird to me, but I guess not technically illegal.
Lastly, Rule 34 has a policy meant to limit the amount of ‘soft’ porn that appears on the site. They write in the Rules section of the website: “If there are under 60 images of ‘real’ porn of a character, then ‘soft’ porn is allowed until there is enough ‘real’ porn. By ‘soft,’ we mean ecchi, topless men, lots of cleavages, sex juices, fetish wear, bulges, camel toe, bare ass, and generally less explicit erotica. Otherwise, penetration of orifices or visible genitals, anuses, or female nipples is required.”
There 32 rules in total to abide by as a user of Rule 34, which seems like an awful lot to keep track of, especially when it comes to their precise requirements on what kinds of content you can post and how you are expected to post it. Honestly, even if I was into animated porn, this might be too many things to keep track of.
Of course, I agree with the zero-tolerance policy against child porn and beastiality, but there are about 30 other things to keep in mind that are much less important as well. So, you might want to keep this in mind before you decide to join this online community. Some people, though, I know, are into this level of organization and moderation when it comes to their online forums. Either way, I just thought this would be the first thing to know before deciding on using this site.
Not Your Typical Porn Site
Rule 34 is archived solely by tag. It means that you are not able to search by keyword or phrase or anything. Whatever you type in the search box is automatically turned into a tag, which greatly limits how you can browse the site. However, it is a pretty convenient way to find exactly what you’re looking for.
You will likely have to familiarize yourself with the site and the community a little bit. Though, before this truly becomes beneficial—you’ll need to become acquainted with the tags that exist (especially since one of the rules is that you cannot create your own tags that no other image has). I’m not sure how they introduce new material to the site then, knowing this.
The moment you arrive at Rule 34’s home page, you will notice that it is not anything like most porn sites. The first thing you will see is a green page with just a small amount of text in the upper left-hand corner. The text reads, “For legal reasons, we have to point out that: A) This site contains material not suitable for minors […] B) Cookies may be used. Click here if you’re an adult, and you’re ok with that.”
Even after entering the website, it won’t be immediately recognizable as a porn site. You’ll be brought to a page that contains only a search bar, some browsing options, and seven anime catgirls, each holding a sign with a number on it.
At first, I thought they might just be random numbers, but then it occurred to me that it’s probably the number of posts the site contains: 2 – 4 – 8 – 2 – 0 – 6 – 3. Two million, four hundred and eighty-two thousand, sixty-three fucking posts. That is a shit-ton of porn. This site has the potential to be a real haven for animated porn lovers.
Above the search bar, you will also find “Rule 34” written out in a straightforward blue font. Under the logo, you can choose between “Posts,” “Comments,” “Tags,” “Wiki,” and “Documentation.” I started with tags first, just because I was still unsure of how the site worked precisely. Doing so brought me to an enormous list of tags with an alpha-numeric list above it. Even just the “A” section had me scrolling on forever. Tags are also sized by popularity, so that the tag links which contain a higher number of posts are larger. It's a great feature that I kind of wish other sites would adopt. It just makes browsing porn a little bit easier.
High-Resolution Images, but Lacking Community Features
“Ariel” caught my eye as I was scrolling through the tags. Clicking on it led me to hundreds of pornofied Little Mermaid images. Some looked to be very artistically rendered, just as good as in the movie; others seemed to be more user-created, kind of like fan art of Arielle getting fucked in various scenarios.
I settled on an excellent drawing of Eric (Arielle’s love interest in the tale) eating Arielle’s ass. She is on her stomach and raising her beautiful, plump ass to Eric’s face, which is buried within it; her face is one of seductive passion, bedroom eyes, and all. Again, I’m not into toon porn, but I could see someone who was, being really into this drawing.
The images all appear in extremely high resolution and are, frequently, rather large by default, allowing you to fully enjoy the detail in them (you can also change the size of the image if you wish). Under the image, you will find the uploader, a list of relevant tags, a URL of the image’s source, and user comments. Anyone can comment, it turns out, with or without a username. It is always great to see a site (especially one that is mainly focused on user-uploads) embrace the potential of community features.
That being said, I think Rule 34, just like Rule34Hentai, could embrace such features a little more. Although users technically have “profiles” affiliated with their handles, there is not much in the way of personalization or communication. I would have liked to see a feature that allows you to curate your personal galleries at the very least. Or an ability to chat with fellow users. But no such luck. Actually, come to think of it, Rule 34 does not even provide you the ability to rate images.
If you love animated porn, hentai, manga, 3d renderings, or anything non-human, Rule 34 has fucking tons of it. Their tag system should make finding it simple, and it is all high-resolution, high-quality stuff. They are missing some prominent community features, though, and I’m not crazy about the site design (plus, ads). But just because it’s not for me doesn’t mean that you won’t enjoy it. Check it out for yourself.