Dane Jones

Dane Jones porn! So, you've hit that sweet spot in life where you're ready to shell out for some quality porn. Congrats, motherfucker! I'm all for dropping some cash for a fuck-ton of extra goodies, or should I say, one price for a whole goddamn network. Seems like you've picked up a thing or two from my reviews, huh? Smart move to squeeze every last drop out of that membership, and you can't go wrong with a site like danejones.com.

Now, I know the name might throw you off a bit. "Dane Jones" sounds like either some dude going solo on a rampage or some chick filming her dirty deeds with her gal pals in dingy parks but the reality couldn't be further from that shitshow. Danejones.com is a fucking powerhouse, and it's got its own bag of tricks that sets it apart from the rest. Let's dissect this shit!

The first impression

I couldn't give two shits about when the hell danejones.com launched, and I sure as hell ain't wasting my time looking that crap up. What I do know is that hordes of horny motherfuckers like you flock to that site month after month, and that alone says something about its damn quality. Sure, you can't compare the traffic on danejones.com to Pornhub or any other tube site, but you can get a rough idea from some of the stats floating around.

Now, let me tell you, I've stumbled upon danejones.com before, and I've always come across that little note saying it's porn for women, and I gotta admit, I've had a hard time wrapping my head around that shit. If "porn for women" means the chick always gets her rocks off in the videos, then hell yeah, danejones.com is the goddamn poster child for that shit. Still, don't go thinking it's some vanilla-ass site where chicks light candles and massage their tits with fancy oils for two goddamn hours. Nah, danejones.com is straight-up hardcore!

I mean, even if you are not a paying member of the joint, you can still see that swimming pool romp where a chick gobbles on her man's cock, fucks his brains out in one of the most intense dick rodeos I've seen lately, only to get a full-on facial. None of that sappy bullshit where the dude paints her toenails or dives into the pool to fetch her a diamond ring he hid earlier just to pop the question. None of that weak-ass crap here! Just so you fucking know! Alright, let's keep it moving.

Danejones.com is a part of an xxx network

Yeah, this is a review of danejones.com, but I simply can't look at it as a standalone website. It's not like you can pay for danejones.com alone, so why does it fucking matter how many videos danejones.com has it total. By paying one membership, you unlock the entire SexyHub Porn Network, and at the time of this review, this full xxx collection has counted around 3.3K movies in total. That's fucking a lot! Way more than you'll ever need, really, and such a huge number speaks damn volumes about the site's diversity. I mean, when you've got a whole fucking circus of different sites under one roof, you're guaranteed to have more variety than you can shake your dick at.

I have good news and bad news. Let's tackle the crap first, shall we? So, danejones.com is one of those stingy-ass paysites that keeps everything under lock and key for non-paying schmucks like you. You can't even get a whiff of what it's really about just by poking around the damn homepage. All you get are these measly video previews, and we all know that ain't fucking enough.

On the flipside, danejones.com offers a 2-day trial priced at $1 only. This trial gives you access to the network's six sites in total, and two days is fucking enough to see if danejones.com rocks your damn boat. With the limited info this site gives me (and that's fucking annoying), I can't tell you if the trial version unlocks the entire xxx library, but in any case, you have more than enough time and videos to see what danejones.com is all about.

The content is fucking lit

You're here for the content, right? Well, I'm pleased to tell you that danejones.com serves nothing but high-res videos. That swimming pool romp is so crystal fucking clear that you can see the water rippling during the blowjob scene, and that's one of the things you will never get from your favorite tube site. That's for damn sure! Also, danejones.com and the sexyhub network hires only professional sluts to do the dirty work, and what's even better is that they are all listed in the site's Models section. That list is a cool filtering tool if you have model preferences.

Speaking of filters, they are all packed in a neat little menu in the site's upper right corner. First of all, you can choose the most viewed videos or the ones with most views. That shit is a huge time-saver when you're dealing with a library that's bursting at the seams with over 3K porn flicks. You can sort by the release date and the date range, and speaking of dates, there something I want to tell you.

The SexyHub network uploads one new flick every seven days, sharp. One weekly update might not sound like fucking much, but when it cums to paysites, it's the damn norm. If you're one of those assholes demanding a new batch of flicks every goddamn day, then go hit up chinesegrainyporn.com or some shit. And hey, you can mix and match filters to your heart's content, and of course, danejones.com has a sweet list of categories to explore.

The price of danejones.com

The first and cheapest option is the trial I mentioned earlier. It's always a cool, fair move in my book, but just so you know, this limited access 2-day trial period automatically rebills at $39.99 every 30 days until canceled. Just thought you should know. Then you have the monthly membership. This little fucker is priced at $29.99/month.

As it usually happens, the longer the time period, the better the prices. To gain full access to danejones.com for 90 days, you'll have to pay $19.99/month. Finally, the yearly membership plan is $9.16/month. The thing that I can't emphasize enough here is that whatever membership plan you choose, you unlock the entire xxx network with sites like danejones.com, lesbea.com, massagerooms.com, momxxx.com, fitnessrooms.com, and so on.

SexyHub is big and diverse enough to last you a lifetime

Back to the content! To help you get an idea of the shit you can expect from danejones.com, I'm gonna tell you about the movies that are on the site's first page right now. Needless to say that my cock approves! "POV creampie sex with Ukrainian Arina Shy", "Big ass ebony Latina in gym Mih Ninfetihna", "Cute Lesbians Romantic Scissoring"...I think you got the damn idea.

As a content writer, I need to applaud the site's titles which are damn informative, holding all the terms regarding the fuck positions, body type, and the name of the star. That shit is a godsend when you are deciding which video to play, and when you combine that shit with the fact that danejones.com shows video previews, you fucking know that the only thing shooting in the dark here will be your rigid cock.

Another thing I want to note is that danejones.com mainly shows European porn, so you might keep your expectations in check. Don't expect those American-made knockers the size of the damn globe, and since danejones.com shows couples sex mostly, don't expect a whole bunch of threesomes or gangbangs. That's just not something danejones.com deals with.

The final word

Danejones.com is a lit porn joint if you are into couples, European porn, and HD videos. Damn, who the fuck isn't? For the price of one membership, you unlock the entire SexyHub network, and that translates to over 3K crystal-clear videos. This bad boy updates its collection every single week, so you know you're never gonna run dry on fresh content. Plus, the chicks? Oh man, they're not just smoking hot! They're talented as hell!

With enough diversity to satisfy even the filthiest of cravings, you'd be a damn fool not to dive right in. In case you are still on the fence, go with that 2-day trial option. Now, go on, sign up, and proceed with the payment, fuckers! Trust me, it's the smartest goddamn decision you'll make all day! I'm outta here!