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No matter if you lost your virginity to your spouse or are a sex god who is getting ass on a weekly basis, it never hurts to get some additional advice on how to fuck better. I could say loads about this, but I’ll focus on something a lot of people skip on: foreplay.
Even if you think you are good at it, I bet there are some things you may not know about. Kissing and hugging for a bit is great, but I find it to be a bit crude.
And no, for once, I don’t mean that as a good or neutral thing.
Just sticking to that can get boring, and depending on who you’re sleeping with may not even do much for them or you. However, if you learn how to target and pleasure very specific parts of the body properly, you can get your partner in a state so horny they’ll be begging to fornicate full-on.
From front to back the neck is a good spot for stimulation
Fun fact: surveys going back to the seventies men have often thought that the first thing women notice in men is his basket or arms. Instead, one of the things which women actually notice initially is a guy’s neck.
Yeah, no really, it’s true – there is legit science behind this.
Similarly, I know a ton of guys out there take notice of a nice looking gals neck as well. Not only are they another fine feature of human anatomy, but it’s a great way to have some good foreplay. Nearly everyone has a little bit of sensitivity on and around the throat, and it’s not a bad place to start.
But don’t stop there; once you’ve done some light petting on that area, work your way to the back. A lot of people much enjoy getting caressed, kissed, and massaged on the nape of the neck, women exceptionally so.
Lastly, if you both have a kinky side, this is the goto spot for biting. Clearly, you’re not going to want to skink your teeth in so hard that you draw blood or leave a big bruise. However, near hickey levels of biting and sucking can elicit some exciting moans and groans.
You can’t go wrong touching, rubbing, and nibbling on the ears
Even more so than the neck, the ears are made of thin skin, covered in vellus hair, but has far more sensitive nerves per square millimeter. In my opinion, running a finger or two, if not some mouthparts for at least a couple minutes are practically mandatory to start a passionate fuck with.
The whole area is a hot spot, but I find that the top of the ear and the lobe are primo territory.
If it doesn’t naturally occur to you, once you advance to this stage in the foreplay, start whispering sweet nothings. If you don’t know how to do that, it’s super simple. Just channel your inner ASMR vlogger spirit and aggressively whisper nonsense words.
Just be careful not to release too much spittle.
Don’t forget about the sensitivity of fingertips
When getting into these sorts of discussions with friends, it amazes me that people forget about one of the parts of the body which are more sensitive than most: the hand.
If you haven’t considered it, think about licking, biting and rubbing the palm, the digits, the whole works. Like another appendage that sticks out, the tips are the most sensitive.
Just be sure to wash your hands thoroughly and clean your fingernails.
Besides being ticklish, touching the armpits can be titillating
While the hair here is thicker, unlike other EZs, this part of the body can be an “oh, yeah” point for many people.
Using your fingers are enough and, from what I’ve read, the only way to please a person on this part of the body. As a nice bonus, stimulating armpits can release pheromones which will subconsciously heighten the sexual mood.
Sure all of this may sound weird because some adults are still ticklish there. However, not everyone is, and those who are being “tickle tortured” can be fun for those sorts of people.
Try the point were ass meets the back
Everyone knows that a back massage is a fantastic way to melt away tension and is a goto move when trying to set the mood. However, not everyone knows that certain parts of the dorsal half of the torso are better stimulated than others.
The shoulder blades, delts, and neck regions are fine places to start, but what doesn’t give a lot of attention is the lower back.
Scientifically referred to as the sacrum and considered to be a chakra point in eastern mysticism, a little bit of pressing on this boney bit above the hips can open more than just chia pools, if you get what I’m saying. XD
I’ll probably have to do another post or two on this, but if you want some links to places to get info on erotic massage, click over to this page.
If you’re looking to establish a rhythm, if you’re new to this, just recite the chorus to My Neck, My Back by Khia. In addition to setting the pace, this song is an excellent addition to a sex session playlist.
Don’t be scared to play with feet
Yeah, I know foot fetishism isn’t for everyone, and honestly, I’m not crazy about it. However, I do know that this is one of the most common kinks out there. If he or she is, letting your partner play with your footsies can get them up and ready to go better than anything else.
Like other forms of foreplay, the pleasure can go both ways.
A common way to not only please your partner but also get them to destress is an extended foot massage. In this case, adding as much pressure as you can will get you the best results for most folks.
If you’re never gotten or given one, try it after a long day as soon as you can. Since so much stress can be pedally stored, I promise you’ll be impressed by the results.
Another reason why you should open your mind to some foot simulation is because of the way human nerves are wired together. The many nerves in the feet send signals to the same part of the brain which process stimuli from the genital area.
Talk about a nice evolutionary quirk, eh?
Everyone likes a little nipple play – or for some quite a lot
Whether you are a man or woman, straight or guy, isn’t it true that everyone loves a nice pair of nipples?
Even if you’re a leg or ass person, those bumpy dots on the chest can (and often are) highly sensitive spots for most people. It may surprise you, but in both genders, they are packed with delicate nerves and, like a clit or dick, can become erect when the person is aroused.
In fact, a good indicator that you’ve done your job with the other techniques discussed is seeing a pair of hard nips.
There are a whole number of ways to get there without using other moves and just focusing on the chest region. For beginners, merely kissing the chests or breasts and working towards the areolas. Sucking, licking, or lightly nibbling on them is nearly always an excellent way to go.
Besides that, fingers can be just as effective and provide the opportunity to use other forms of nipple pleasing technique. Just be careful not to grab a handful and squeeze too hard – especially if you’re playing with a woman or a fat man!
In addition to using your body, there are plenty of tools to help you turn your sex buddy on. Fairly cheap gear includes nipple clamps, which provide an ongoing pinch sensation and add a little weight to the pair of nips. Another option would be to use suction cups, which make it feel like a vampire is sucking on your chest. If properly applied, they’ll stay on throughout the rest of your foreplay and even the roughest fuck.
If you’re feeling really kinky, look up the Wartenberg wheel. No, it’s not some obscure scientific measuring device but a spiked wheel attached to a rod which is ideal for providing a pricking feeling all over the body, the nipples in particular.
If you want to feel something a little less intense, there are other items that can provide another dimension of pleasure as well, like a feather or even a toothbrush.
These may seem like minor forms of stimulus, but there are people out in the world who have managed to orgasm from nipple play alone!
Try knocking on the backdoor
Anyone who watches a lot of porn or even just a little has probably noticed that there is a ton of fun to be had on camera via ass fucking.
For some reason, though, there isn’t many other forms of assplay. After all, a finger can be just as good as a dick, even better since a digit is much more flexible. Now I know some people may be a bit weirded out by going down on a poophole, but if ya’ll take the time to prep beforehand there’s nothing to worry about.
Let’s get into that little safety precaution first.
Just like other kinds of sex, the best way to get ready is to practice basic hygiene, diet properly, and get on a bathroom schedule. That alone will prevent certain, shall I say, accidents from happening and should help the front and backend smell and perform better.
Further, to make sure things are really cleaned out down, there invest in a goddamn enema. They are cheap as hell to buy, highly effective, and require no skill to use. Once you or your partner has squirted and evacuated a few times – or whenever you eliminate clearly – you should be good to go.
Last bit on this, it’d be a good idea to skip eating several hours before engaging in ass banditry.
Okay, with that safety guide and PSA out of the way, we’ll get into the fun. Sticking a finger or two up the bum hole can do as much for a man as a woman. For guys you can end up can massaging the prostate. If you’re finger blasting a woman, the goal is to stimulate the skeen gland.
In both cases, work your way in and aim downish (i.e., toward the taint area) and feel around for a bit. You’ll know you have when your partner involuntarily shudders and/or shouts. 😉
Just make sure that you lube everything up sufficiently and don’t just dive in. The general guide for butt play is this: use more lube than you think you need, then add more. After that, start slow and speed up as you both are comfortable with.
You don’t even have to penetrate the bum button to turn your wo/man on. Just rubbing around the hole with a little bit of KY or spit can be plenty effective.
On a final note, if you do employ this technique, it’s the perfect way to get things adequately stretched and greased up before a smooth or rough ass fuck.
A butt rub can be a good substitute for posterior poking
If the idea of “true” ass play is too much for you, you haven’t had time to prep, or you want to do something different, an ass massage can be delightful. Naturally, guys and gals who are drawn to the booty more than anything are going to love this, but their partner should as well.
Despite being a thick part of the body, this fine piece of muscle has a bunch of generalized nerve endings. With just a few minutes of rubbing is enough for most people to relax their holes, even their whole body.
Got a taste for the wild side? Why not pull out a paddle or buy a riding crop and start testing pain thresholds?
Pro tip: While you’re massaging down and around here, think about switching it up a bit with some massage between the thighs.
Now let’s focus on the goodies all over the genital area
Now that we’ve covered everything besides the crotch, let’s get into the other most sensitive area on the body. Of course, in this case, men and women are clearly different, so let’s focus on the fellas first and save the best for last.
The Real Ways to Please Your Man
If you pay attention to the trash women’s magazines sold in supermarket checkout aisle, you’ll see all sorts of “advice” on how to make a man feel good while in the sack. I’ll skip a full rant and sum up by saying most of these articles are worthless.
And to be honest, not all mainstream porn is particularity good at giving a guide on how to take care of a dick. Sure it looks cool to see a nubile girl gliding her fist over an above-average cock, but most guys aren’t built that way, nor do they find that thing all that interesting.
Instead, focus on each part of the male anatomy in different ways. To start, playing with the balls is a great way to get things going and should be enough to get him hard. You’ll have to play it by ear (so guys be vocal), but I’d say to be firm but not too rough. If you go down for some sucky-suck that’s good as well, but you don’t have to act like a vacuum cleaner and risk detaching something.
**Ouch!**
When it comes to pleasuring the penis, each guy is different, so ask and experiment with using teeth, tongue, or just your lips. On average, the base of the shaft is a good place to start, but most guys are going to feel it further up the pole and maybe the head, especially if he has foreskin.
Speaking of which, don’t neglect that. With just a little bit of tugging, you might even coax out some moans and groans from your guy.
Lastly, between the sack and asshole is the taint and, if you press on it just right, you can hit the prostate externally. It’ll make your guy feel good before and during fucking, but best of all, hitting this spot right before he climaxes will amplify his orgasm.
Pleasuring a Woman Between-Me-Down-There
It’s a common gripe among men and bars and an ongoing joke in just about every sitcom. You know the one I’m talking about – the stereotype that women are hard if not impossible to please.
For the inexperienced, it may be a little tough – certainly if you’re not a lesbian – but with some trial and error getting a girl’s motor running and on the road to orgasm-ville will be a piece of pie.
To break down the basics, the vulva (what most people wrongly call the vagina) is divided primarily into the big button, the clitoris up by the pubes, what I call the big petals or labia major, and the littler inside one, the labia minor.
If you actually go deep enough into the vagina (AKA the love tunnel) a few inches, you’ll hit the almighty G-spot. While the clit is the main point of female pleasure, hitting the big G is a close second.
Don’t think I’m condescending by pointing these basics out – it’s just that some people (still!) don’t know this.
Now that we’ve outlined the territory let’s get into how to play the field correctly. All you’ll need are your fingers and some maybe a little bit of tongue action. Diving straight down there when a guy has a hard-on can work with men. But in my experience, it’s better to go slower with women. Start by kissing all around the pleasure cave and then work your way towards the bush.
You can start diddling the labias with your fingers or mouth, which is a good way to get started, but the best ticket to a hot warmup is going down on the clitoris. Delivering a good tongue drilling down there can be done a number of ways, but my advice would be to recite the alphabet.
It doesn’t matter if you want to use the Latin, Cyrillic, Greek, or Hangul – any of them will give your girl an eye-rolling face ride.
Once your lady is turned on – and you can tell when her pussy is wetter than Niagara Falls – then slip something in the front hole to hit that Gräfenberg point.
But I have to admit: I don’t know what exactly is going to work in your situation, so play around, mix things up and see what works.
ThePornDude’s final words
If you are looking for even more advice on who to improve your sex life, just scroll through archived posts on the rest of the blog. I’ve covered everything from providing fresh ideas on how to make your homemade sex toys, where to buy new ones, and list loads of ideas for kinky things to try.
Need even more fuel for your carnal imagination? Look up my post on the best sex scenes made during coronavirus lockdown. They’re all amazing, show off a variety of sexy goodness, and, best of all, you can view them for free!
Until the next blog goes live, have a good one, and stay safe.
