The Perfect Boobs

My search for The Perfect Boobs has taken me to many strange places in my years as a professional masturbator. It’s brought me from the dirtiest strip clubs to the dankest porn shops in the sketchiest parts of town, to every fucking weird-ass corner of the internet. I mean, shit, if you’re a regular here at ThePornDude, I’m sure you already knew that. Then again, maybe you landed here today because you use Google and have the same interests as me. Hey, nice to meet you—want to see some titties?

In any case, you came to the right place. Together, we’ll find just that ideal rack, that perfect tata, that set of jugs that finally makes your life complete. And just where are we going to look? Today’s field trip is to a joint that puts the whole noble quest right there in the title: ThePerfectBoobs.net is a discussion forum devoted entirely to fake boobies. Of course, that might turn off the melon fans looking for big naturals, as these guys have a particular definition of perfect. But if you like your boobs enhanced by modern science, you may just fit in around here.

Talking About Fake Titty Fans

ThePerfectBoobs presents their definition of perfection pretty clear right from the outside. The girl in the logo in the corner has boobs that remind me of oversized olives making the O’s in the site’s name. And before I even reach the list of forums on the front page, I’m greeted by a big-ass banner ad for some movies starring a chick with overinflated jugs that look like they’re about to pop. “Top Stretching” reads the text wrapped around one of her ballooning breasts. There’s no mistaking her aftermarket parts for the original.

Aside from the silicone-themed accouterments, ThePerfectBoobs.net has a pretty standard forum setup. The domain’s been around for over a decade now. Still, the current incarnation has been online since 2017, according to the little Info Center at the bottom of the page. The funny thing is, it looks like pretty much every other forum from the dawn of the new millennium up to the latest message boards. The format just doesn’t require all the same sparkle and flash as the 4K lesbian paysites and amateur free tubes.

What it does require is an active user base, and that’s something The Perfect Boobs has. According to the tally at the bottom, they’ve had over 5,000 viewers online at one point. Today’s crowd is a little more modest, with over 500 by the time I checked out the site at lunchtime. I know it’s a tenfold difference, but either group is impressive when you’re talking about a discussion forum. This is an active community of fake titty fans.

Any forum thrives on its userbase, especially when those users are contributing. It wouldn’t be much fun if it was just one dude posting and thousands of lurkers lurking, but these boob fans are loud and proud. By the numbers, there have been over half a million posts on over 40,000 topics. So what do you want to contribute to the discussion?

What Are These Subforums All About?

Once you start looking at the actual subforums listed on ThePerfectBoobs, you begin to get more of a sense of their userbase. It’s not just fans of surgically enhanced titties, as I initially expected, but owners of said enhanced titties as well. That alone makes the site noteworthy, as the two parties tend to be on opposite sides of the internet. (Incidentally, have you checked out PornDudeCasting yet? I’ve been banging hot pornstars every week, and some of them have some huge fake boobies!)

The forums at the top are grouped as The Perfect Boobs Talk. This is where you’ll find general discussions about fake tits, star forum members with their own pairs, as well as subforums on surgery, XXL implants, and real-life experiences with implants. I found a really hilarious thread in the General Discussion forum where someone unironically asked why air-filled fake tits aren’t more popular. A couple of the replies responded with some variation of “The schools have failed us.”

It isn’t all bullshit and dumbasses, though. I fell down a rabbit hole in a thread about fake-tit girls doing jumping jacks or jogging. The keys on my laptop are way stickier than when I started writing this review, but it felt so nice making them that way.

Moving past The Perfect Boobs Talk, the next section of ThePerfectBoobs is called The Perfect Boobs Appreciation. This one’s pretty self-explanatory, with subforums breaking down to the different types of fake-boob owners. There’s a subforum for Models, another for Amateurs, one for Adult Entertainers, and even one for Transsexuals. I like that they’ve given XXL Models and Amateurs their own board, so you can get right to the broads with the biggest boobs in the world.

The site’s called ThePerfectBoobs.net, but they’ve also got a section devoted to The Perfect Body. It’s kind of interesting which body parts they’ve chosen for inclusion because only Booties and Lips get their own dedicated subs. Anything else goes under Everything Else, and there’s also a place to post Morphs.

There’s also a section devoted to Sexually Explicit Content, which I bet you were kind of expecting. The sub-board about Movie and Site Reviews doesn’t get much attention, maybe because the best reviewer has his own site called ThePornDude, but they have wonderful collections of other content. The Art, 3D, Toons, and CGI board is hopping, as is the Stories area. There’s also a whole board about escorts with enhanced breasts.

The folks who run the site seem pretty good about archiving the older, better posts as the whole forum continues to grow because there’s an Archive section at the bottom. You can’t post in this section, but you can read posts going back years.

But There’s One Weird Thing

In case you couldn’t add it up through all the above paragraphs, ThePerfectBoobs.net has an absolute fucking shit-ton of free content. It’s a little mind-boggling how deep the entire thing runs, so don’t be surprised if you end up wasting the whole day and a whole box of tissues just perusing the different boards. I hope your boss wasn’t expecting much productivity today, and I hope HR isn’t monitoring your browser history. Oh, and I hope nobody else has to use your mouse.

Here’s the fucking weirdest thing about this site: they officially phased out explicit content years ago. I found some during my visit, but users can be banned for posting anything involving sex. A visit to ThePerfectBoobs Pornstars forum shows a ton of threads locked back in 2017 and just one post added in 2024.

It’s a little bizarre for a site about big breasts to ban explicit content, but hey, I don’t make the rules. I just report on them and give my opinion. In this case, my opinion is that the rule stinks, but the site is still worth a few shakes of the ol’ ding-dong if you appreciate big boobies.

If you’re really enjoying the experience and want more, there’s also an exclusive member’s area with over 3200 images. The catch here is that you have to donate 15 euros or equivalent in bitcoin. That buys you access for a year, which is way fucking cheaper than just about any pay site you could sign up for. I read through the intro posts for the Exclusive Member Boards, and as far as I can tell, they don’t include actual sex either. So I think I’ll stick with the free membership until that changes.

Maybe ThePerfectBoobs.net doesn’t need to change much, though. There are so many online forums that feel like ghost towns, where nobody’s posting anything, and the newest threads are a year old. The Perfect Boobs is certainly not hurting for visitors or contributors, and the monetary need for the member’s section reflects that. The site has stuck around on a crowded internet by existing as a place where implant owners and fans can talk about the subject without being bombarded by a million porn ads. It’s not like you can’t find big-boob porn on the porn site, but where else will you have an intelligent and sophisticated conversation on the matter?