If you haven’t noticed, I think porn is great. However, it isn’t exactly the best guide to learn how to fuck well. That is unless you’re a well-hung pizza man who can stay rock hard for about three hours at a stretch, then maybe it is. But for most guys, getting an idea of how to make his woman make toe-curling moans as she hits the Big O from smut, it isn’t that helpful.
“But Porn Dude,” some of you might say, “I don’t have the strength, flexibility or stamina to put myself into kama sutra type sex positions to please my lady.” And to that, I say, “Don’t sweat it.”
Fortunately, I’ve got a list of simple tips and techniques to use. Once you get these moves mastered, you can get her “there” in what seems like just a hot minute.
And for those of you who think you can get her to cum okay already, learning how to do it well is even better, right? After all, nothing is more manly than getting your girl to uncontrollably scream like a banshee with you inside her.
(You’re both fucking welcome.)
The Don’ts of Getting Her to Cum
– Don’t just stick it in there – yeah, I know it feels good to you, but simply thrusting your cock into her clam isn’t going to get her there. To master the female orgasm, you’ve got to step your game up beyond just dick diving.
– Skip on the foreplay – this part of fucking is just as important for you as it is for her. Sometimes more so. As the old adage goes, no matter how long you think the pre-fucking fun should go, triple it.
– Be afraid to use some lube – Nah, it ain’t just for anal. Lubing up her lady parts can not only help her get over the hill but make you last longer, too.
– Be overconfident – Yeah, I know ladies like a rugged, take-charge man. But it is easy to think that your some sex god only to get all flustered if you fuck up during your pre-sex striptease or fart halfway through the act or do some other embarrassing thing. Relax and just go with it. Oh, and if your first nut is a little slippery, don’t take a chance. Rub that shit out first. That way your second coming is just like the climax to a good movie. It takes some time to build up, it’s unexpectedly explosive and epically satisfying.
The Dos of Getting Her to Cum
– Know where the clitoris is – and if you don’t know to find it! Without finding out where this magic little flesh switch is, you’re going to have a hard time getting her to make that sweet cum face.
– Feel free to break out the toys – every guy thinks that he has a magic dick, but don’t feel bad if using toys helps get your girl into gear. If anything, think about it as the warm-up to the main act.
– Add some cushion for the pushing and keep pillows handy – as you’ll see through this guide, propping up your bodies’ with pillows makes certain positions a lot easier to get into. Remember this tip in particular. It’ll come in handy later.
– Bump n’ grind before give her the big (or average-sized) surprise – a good foreplay technique which will tease the hell out of your girl is if you brush up against, brush past, and tease her pussy with your cock. Don’t just touch your dick end next to her lips a little but all over her lady parts. This might take some self-control on your part, but it’ll be worth it for both of you.
Now let’s get int to the list.
Doggy Style
We’re going to start with an oldie but goodie. Not only does this give you great access from behind but also the chance to easily start rubbing on your girl’s clitoris. You, her, or both of you can take turns playing wax on wax off on the tip of her puddy. And along with clitoral stimulation, this is also a position to hit the G-spot, too.
Bro tip: if you want to spice things up, give her a visual delight, and yourself an ego boost, place a mirror in front of both of you and try doing the moose.
(Points and gold stars to anyone who actually does do that and emails with their funny story.)
The one problem with this position is that you might have trouble adjusting for differences in height. If you are significantly taller than she is, you might want to prop her knees up on a pillow.
Reverse Cowgirl (And Variations)
Cowgirl is great, but by reversing the way that she’s riding you, it’s easier for you to both rock her hips up and down and dig down into her snatch at the same time. The fun part about this position is that it puts her in control and allows you to lay back, relax, and enjoy the ride.
To add some additional stimulation and some support for her, you might want to bring one of your legs up so that your foot is flat on the floor. The leg support will help her bounce up and down, sway side to side, or do whatever feels good for both of you. Plus, if you’ve got hairy legs, the extra stimulation might tickle her mini-tip.
Not only will this help your girl get off while she’s riding you, but this position is also great for guys who like looking at ass.
Couch Plowing
Also known as the Pillow Push, this can be done on any couch, padded bar stool, or a comfortable piece of furniture which will support both of your weight. For best results, you’d also going to need an extra pillow, too.
Basically, this is kind of like a form of doggy style where you’re both kneeling or crouching against the furniture you started on. Make sure that the pillow is right next to your girl’s pelvis and stick it in from behind. The idea is to thrust from an angle so that she ends up double-clicking her mouse against the pillow.
To really spice things up, put a vibrator on the pillow. Then place one hand on her hip and with your free hand play with the vibrator settings. Whatever you do, try to put consistent pressure into your thrusts. If you lean forward that’ll help and it’ll put you into a dominant position which a lot of women love.
If she wants it and you feel you can handle it, start pounding away until you’re pretty sure you’re going to need to throw away the pillow you used from all of the squirting. And props to you if you do.
Rear Entry
In a lot of ways, this is just like couch plowing. The major difference is that your girl starts out lying on her stomach with you over top of her. Other than that, the same techniques and toys apply.
This is a particularly good way to not only stimulate the clit but also hit the legendary G-spot with ease. You might want to adjust leg positions based on your own needs since some girls may prefer to have their legs extended or propped up with their hips a little. But no matter what you do, keep fishing around and eventually you get there.
Just be careful not to go through the wrong door. Without warning or prep that could be a bad, brown surprise for both of you.
Unless you’re into that kind of thing.
Missionary
Yeah, that actually is what we’re going to end this list on.
“Oh no, the most boring, vanilla position designed to make sex less enjoyable,” you might be thinking. But trust me, if you do it right you can get the results you both are looking for.
One reason I included it is because it’s so unexpected, and partially because it requires you to combine everything that you’ve learned so far. Do it right, and she’ll be calling you the king of her cunt, the sorcerer of sex, and all kinds of randy, royal names.
With some of these positions, you might have had to use a pillow or I might have recommended you bring in some toys. Now I’m telling to throw everything into the mix. Don’t misunderstand, if you just dive right in you’ll get your rocks off, but your girl probably won’t, no matter how hard or long you go.
And yeah, it doesn’t matter how hard and long you are, either.
Instead, warm her up with some intense foreplay, bump n’ grind for a while before slipping it in. You might want to use a (battery-powered) magic wand to cast a spell of excitement on her pussy, before rewarding her with your magic, mighty scepter. To go a little longer, you also might want to enhance your scepter with a cock ring, preferably with a mini-vibrator on it.
With all of this prep work done, just do what feels right and wait for the fireworks.
P.s. Your girlfriend can thank me personally by sending nudes to my inbox.
